"THOSE FIVE DAYS HERALDED A NEW PHASE"

"At 34, married for nine years, and with three children, I am one of those happy mom-cum- homemakers — but little else. My husband and I had an arranged marriage and we have been happy together. He is a wonderful father to the two girls and one boy we have.

‘’We never had much time for recreation or social activity, what with raising three kids with no reliable help. Travelling was difficult too, so we hardly holidayed together as a family.

Very often, he went out alone to parties because we had nowhere to leave the kids. He hated going without me but soon, it became the norm, something we began to accept. He played golf on the weekends while I at best, managed a movie while he baby-sat. When Rajdeep* got promoted, he became busier than ever and gradually, we began to literally lose touch with each other.

"Like a lot of women, one day, as I looked at myself in the mirror I was attacked by a sudden sense of insecurity. There I was — middle-aged, average-looking, economically dependent, mother of three. What if Rajdeep had an affair? What if we just grew apart? What would I do?

"I became increasingly irritable, mistrusting, insecure... he never really changed, but my own mid- life crisis took its toll on me.

"A few months into this phase, I joined an Art of Living course, while my husband attended to the kids. On my first day, I spotted an extremely handsome man sitting in one corner of the room. I found myself looking for a place to sit near him. A simple exchange of greetings, half a smile and going through the experience together was so pleasant.

I came home and told Rajdeep about him. He was just happy and relieved that I had found something to be happy about. I found myself waiting to get to the course the next day. I found out on day two that the guy was newly married and much younger than I was; the fact that he too, was unavailable, made me feel very happy about the situation and I felt no guilt in making the first step towards introducing myself. We spent an hour that day chatting, which we both enjoyed. We went on to do the advanced course together a few months later.

"Those five days heralded the arrival of a new phase of my life. My sense of insecurity was replaced by a happy anticipation and joy. Whether it was the course or my friend, I don't know but I am back to being a wonderful mom and wife and loving every minute of it. Earlier, I’d told him and his wife about how I was smitten by him; she seemed quite used to it and took it in her stride.

"Today, we correspond by e-mail as friends and our spouses are aware of it.’’

Bhavna Khanna*

* NAMES CHANGED TO PROTECT IDENTITY